THE DELUGE

I loved this one! The author of this 2007 release by Liesure Books, Mark Morris, doesn't diddle around with EXPLAINING anything; he just has someone look out a skyscraper window in London and realize that suddenly THE WHOLE WORLD IS UNDERWATER.

And WHAT NEXT? Drowned bodies everywhere, is what! The world they knew is now a jumble of silty wreckage tangled with filthy, dead shaved monkeys and ALL THE LABELS HAVE WASHED OFF ALL THE CANS. Every meal is pot luck. There's no way to get warm or dry. Bands of bereft bipeds roam the devastated cities, hoping for a meal and some company. The inevitable follows: crazy world takeover attempts, monkeys fighting monkeys, inappropriate sexual contact and MUD, MUD, MUD.

And needless to say this is only the beginning of the challenges facing our survivor-narrators, chosen not because they were immune to a plague or especially plucky or resourceful; they just happened to be on the top floor of a tall building when Dagon called. MORE PROBLEMS ARE COMING UP.

It is to swoon! If I could arrange this myself I'd do it in a heartbeat!

Operative Dies Following "Retirement"

IT'S TRUE, LADIES -- Paul the Psychic Octopus is IN THE ROILING INTESTINE OF DAGON shortly after "retirement" from the business of predicting the outcomes of human sporting events. WE ALL KNOW that his REAL BUSINESS up on dry land was about recruiting humans to the Cause, and WHAT A JOB HE DID in a short time before being CALLED HOME.

All airstones please observe a moment of silence.

Mind Control Techniques Continue To Improve

For some reason, these techniques work especially well for Aruanas, Alligator Gars, regular Alligators, and -- as pictured above -- the wily Asiatic Snakehead. Basically, anything long, slender, and LURKING JUST BENEATH THE SURFACE can easily learn to draw the featherless bipeds into the water, helplessly in love with their hypnotists. (For another visual of the same principle, see the visual in the entry immediately before this one. Heh.)

Here we see former housewife and part-time secretary, Doris Belcher, taking over the mind of a human who has NO IDEA that the tank's occupant now virtually OWNS HIS SOUL. (Wait, do humans even have souls? Can someone check on that for me?) He will return to this place AGAIN AND AGAIN until his body is no longer his, either. If Doris moves elsewhere, believe me -- HE WILL FIND HER. At that point he will ENTER THE SEA forever.

I am able to use this photo without fear of a dangerous SECURITY LEAK because we also already have POWER OF ATTORNEY. Doris was no ordinary secretary; she was a LEGAL secretary.

I love this job sometimes!

Go, Lemmings, Go!

INTO THE SEA WITH YOU! PARADISE AWAITS!