Saturday, April 09, 2011

Large-Scale Shrimp Farming In Michigan!?

I COULDN'T BELIEVE MY EYES when I saw this story on the front page of the Detroit Free Press. That guy who's been quietly farming Shrimp in Okemos, MI, for years is trying to scare up a few financial angels to set up a MUCH BIGGER FARM. The idea is to make OUR EXOSKELETAL OPERATIVES into the next big industry in Michigan. This will cost a mere 10 million dollars, American.

The article compares the projected SHRIMP HQ to Ford's Rouge Plant, with a few minor differences. For one thing, the thing will be non-polluting; it will put Michiganders to work instead of LAYING THEM OFF; and to my knowledge (you may be sure we have been watching) there has never been a SHRIMP FARM EXPLOSION, even a small one. If you don't remember the lethal explosion at the Rouge Plant in February of 1999, that's just as well. LIVE by internal combustion, DIE by internal combustion. That's what I always say. No, I don't. Just kidding.

Most importantly, if he can swing this project, it will bring MILLIONS of our operatives into contact with the Shaved Monkeys.

DOES ANYONE HAVE TEN MILLION BUCKS TO PROMOTE THE CAUSE? Again, I'm only kidding. We can't risk the exposure. It's a pity, really...

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