If Only We Could have Gotten This One Recruited!

 

That 'Bat Shark Repellent' in his utility belt was just a little too effective...Adam West died in his bed surrounded by his featherless biped family, which prevented him from sliding in relief down the drain in the middle of a hospital-room floor to JOIN US IN OUR CAUSE.

 

I guess you can't win 'em all.

In Which The Vegans Prove Useful To Us After All

Here you see fisherman Rodney McDonald sending "King Louie" -- easily the longest-lasting restaurant-based operative in this Conspiracy Zone -- BACK TO HQ FOR DEBRIEFING.  The moment captured in this photo ended  "Louie's" 20-year-long visit to Shaved Monkey Central, sorry, I mean the Alma Lobster Shop, after this selfsame fisherman brought "Louie" up in a New Brunswick lobster pot.

"Louie" (real name withheld for security reasons) would not be back home had not Katie Conklin, a card-carrying VEGAN, decided to purchase her FOR THAT SOLE PURPOSE.

I guess it's a case of "CASH AND RELEASE."

It's a far, far better thing they do than the BLAMED FOOLS who killed a similar crustacean operative, codenamed "Larry The Lobster," who was shipped in a sealed container from a Florida restaurant to an aquarium Maine without a circulating water supply, food or -- that unimportant twiddle -- OXYGEN.  He showed up at his destination a week late, suffocated.

(crime scene photo)

 

But BE OF GOOD CHEER, ladies.  NONE OF "LARRY'S" SECRETS HAVE BEEN REVEALED.