Signals 2015 Squidmas Catalogue...Uncorrected

The 'Signals' catalogue is still advertising this lovely item as a "Koi Vase," explaining all the magical properties of Koi and detailing where to place this handsome vase in your home, according to the rules of feng shui, to attract money.  At no point has anyone on the staff noticed that these are

GOLDFISH.

I swear the Monkey People never learn.  They can't even seem to learn the difference between one of these...

...and one of these:

Come on, is it REALLY THAT HARD?

I know, I know.  I'm deploying the Education Squad again, but I have to say at this point I DON'T HAVE MUCH HOPE.

Prepare For A GREAT Season, Ladies...

...Even HUMAN technology confirms that the order-restoring phenomenon they call "El Niño" is going to be GODZILLA-SIZED this year, meaning LOTS OF WEATHER FOR US TO ENJOY and MAKE GOOD USE OF.   Planning is already underway for some SERIOUS RECRUITING.

The nicest thing about this subtle shift in ocean currents, letting loose weather effects that TERRIFY THE FEATHERLESS BIPEDS, is that it keeps them out of the water for MONTHS so we can have some privacy for a change.  Of course, it also makes for great surfing, paddling, and INTERIOR REDECORATING when you live on the ocean floor. It also allows us to redistribute water, hot air and OUR OPERATIVES to where they are needed most.  In OUR estimation, not that of the Naked Apes.