THE ONLY GOOD INDIANS

 

This SPECTACULAR read penned by Stephen Graham Jones -- ISBN 978-1982136451 -- is everyone's REQUIRED READING for this year.  THE SOONER, THE BETTER, LADIES.  

Now, I know what you're all going to ask:  Doesn't this book concern itself with ELK?  What does a novel about ELK and their dealings with the Naked Apes have to do with how FISH are going to take over the world?

WELL,  LET ME EXPLAIN.

CLIFFIE'S NOTES ON WHAT MAY EVENTUALLY PROVE TO BE THE FINEST RECRUITING MANUAL OF ALL:

>> The first thing I want you to notice is the background music of this book.  That sound you hear is not ska, thrash or New Orleans jazz.  ITS GUILT.  GUILT is what brings the human and the nonhuman together in this story, and it forces the actions of every human, half-human and non-human in the story.  Of course, the featherless bipeds owe US much, much more in the way of reparations than all the ungulates who ever lived.  THAT'S WHY I'M HERE, LEADING YOU LADIES TO SET THINGS RIGHT AGAIN.  This book, very simply, shows you how it's done.

>> Every one of you is going to love the will-o'-the-wisp tactics of a certain party in this story.  JUST LIKE US, when you think the encounter is over and everyone's in the clear, THE MAIN CHARACTER POPS BACK UP and they have to deal with it as best they can.

>> You'll notice that some of the recruits FIGHT IT TOOTH AND NAIL, but some dive in eagerly.  YOU GET TO SEE HOW THE RECRUITER DEALS WITH A LOT OF DIFFERENT OPTIONS.

>> Typically for ALL the recruiting manuals out there, this is a horror novel.  But it's a BEAUT of a horror novel, one that will make you smile and sigh happily.  I have to admit I came away AWED by the implacable focus of this recruiter that NEVER WAVERED no matter how many times the tactics and the individual target had to change.

>> THIS IS WHAT I WANT EVERY ONE OF YOU TO BECOME WHEN YOU STEP INTO THE POOL OF DESTINY.  I WANT YOU TO BECOME ANYTHING YOU NEED TO BE IN ORDER TO GET THE JOB DONE.

READ IT.  READ IT AS SOON AS YOU CAN.  

SIP EVERY WORD SLOWLY.