Nessie Dismissed As Big Catfish By Monster Hunter

This guy thinks he has our most famous Scots operative doped out at last.  Steve Feltham, who gave up his home, girlfriend, and the rest of his life to search for the Loch Ness Monster in 1991, admits that he has found NOTHING to indicate that there is an Elasmosaur lurking in the icy depths of the famous Scottish lake.  He thinks Nessie is probably a Sheatfish or Wels.  You know, like Kuno, our famous  Moenchengladbach operative from the European Conspiracy Zone?

 

Of course, as I have explained in a much earlier Cliffie's Note, Nessie is neither a single Sheatfish nor an Elasmosaur.  But not enough people read this blog to understand the subtlety of our methods.  And I am not about the BLOW OUR COVER by revealing why there is a Nessie in the first place.  The Naked Apes keep falling back on these ridiculous explanations that do nothing but MAKE THEM FEEL BETTER ABOUT THE FACT THAT THEY CAN'T FIGURE IT OUT.

CATFISH?  You just keep telling yourself that, Shaved Monkeys.

(See?  Even the Elasmosaurs are laughing at you.)