Tuesday, December 29, 2015

CNBC Admits Existence of Santa Squid!!!

INCREDIBLY, not only was a special visit from the Jingle Squid NOTICED and FILMED by a news crew -- a CNBC headline ADMITS THE IDENTITY of the special visitor, calling her a "Christmas Squid"!  That's about as close to the truth as you can EXPECT from a Shaved Monkey reporter, even at Squidmas time.


>> Of COURSE she visited Japan and nowhere else.  Where else is she going to the appreciation she deserves?

>> She wisely chose NOT to appear in Tokyo Bay, where Godzilla has waded ashore so many times, instead choosing Toyama Bay, already well-known for its population of so-called Firefly Squid.  "Cephalopods of a feather," and all that.

>> While the North American concept of the Jingle Squid involves a gift-wrapped box in each tentacle, just to tie it in with that creepy housebreaker Santa Claus, the Japanese understand that such a sighting is A GIFT IN ITSELF.  Adding gift wrapping would only GILD THE LILY.

>> The news item pointed out that a frogman accompanied the visitor back to the open ocean without attempting to kill or dissect our operative -- a pretty respectful interaction compared to this living crime scene, which we remember bitterly from the headlines of Squidmas 2006:

Does anyone but me remember the headline?  "Giant Squid Captured Live On Film And Dead On Hook."  It hardly bears thinking about.

But this latest encounter suggests some Naked Apes are CATCHING ON.  Who knows? 


Blogger Ur-spo said...


6:31 PM  
Anonymous Dr. Kaiju said...

This is NOT Santa Squid. Santa Squid only brings one gift, the sweet release of death.

5:50 PM  

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