Times Like These Make Me Wish I Could Change Your Theater Of Operations...

 

 

...to ANYWHERE OTHER than the pocket of ocean that leads from the armpit of Texas to what the Shaved Monkeys call the Atlantic Ocean.  It's astonishing that they managed another MILLION-GALLON OIL SPILL on the anniversary of the 1989 Exxon Valdez disaster.  And it's only been about 4 years since the LAST atrocious oil spill in the same stretch of water, just a little closer to the sunrise, that we all remember from when the Deepwater Horizon  blew up.  These are terrible days to be a crab, fish or aquatic bird in the Gulf -- the photo of the operative above was taken 2 days ago.

One of our dining-out operatives reports that they had a special discussion today on CNN, explaining how hard it is to find the RIGHT debris on satellite photos, because the plane someone put in the Indian Ocean is proving fairly difficult to find.  ASK US.  ASK US WHERE THE OILSLICK AND THE PIECES OF WING AND FUSELAGE ARE.  WE CAN TELL YOU EXACTLY.  But nobody with two legs ever asks a fish. 

And they can't find THAT debris because of all the floating gill nets, boogie board pieces, packing peanuts and Q-tip sticks decorating the surface of every waterway on earth.  Needle in a haystack, they said, except the needle moves several hundred miles a day and the haystack goes with it.

Do you see what I'm on about now?  Homo sap  destroys everything he touches.  Get out there and recruit every last one.  The sooner we turn them all into Skipjack and Herrings, the better.