THE LUST LIZARD OF MELANCHOLY COVE

Now this is what I call a GOOD STORY, ladies. This fine novel, copyrighted 1999 to Christopher Moore and published by Harper Collins, EXPLAINS EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW about the effects of our recruiting operatives on Naked Apes. OK, there are a FEW FLAWS, but nothing that doesn't ultimately HELP US. Nobody wants ALL our secrets in print.

Here are the things Moore -- a human -- gets RIGHT:

>> The scene is one of creeping human despondency until Steve, an aquatic reptile, comes ashore and CHANGES EVERYTHING.

>> The romantic attachments formed in the course of the story RESOLVE EVERYTHING FOR EVERYONE.

>> Despite the gross physical discrepancies between Steve the recruiting lizard and his primary contact,a B-picture actress with a bit of a mental disorder, LOVE FINDS A WAY.

I know, I know, there are a few issues here. The author has poor Steve wafting pheromones everywhere, randomly, causing the humans in Pine Cove to be overwhelmed with UNGOVERNABLE LUST. As if we needed to intervene to make THAT happen! And of course the goal would NEVER be to get them to have sex TOGETHER. This recruitment campaign is about INTERSPECIES ROMANCE, thank you very much. But never mind, this is a fun read with a great deal to recommend it. BUY A COPY. USE CONSPIRACY FUNDS. LEAVE THE BOOK WHERE SOMEONE WILL FIND IT.