OK, OK, I give...

Cards and letters have been pouring in, demanding commentary on the recent capture and torture killing of yet another Squid operative, this time near the disputed territory known to the Shaved Monkeys as "New Zealand."

And before you say ANYTHING, you know how I stand on landscum species distinctions. "Giant," "Colossal," who cares? WE ALL KNOW HIS REAL NAME.

I am nothing but depressed about the killing. This was not planned. One minute he was living out his life happily, and the next he was dangling at the end of a gaff. I have searched but cannot now find the comment by the enraged operative who promised "bitter, bitter ink" in retribution. Have no fear, my friend; WE'LL SEE TO THAT.

If I still had hands that could form into fists, I would shake them at the sky.