Shark Panic Stand-Down!

OK, calls and letters are pouring in, complaining that our operatives are being exploited. BBC News online has published their finding that Pentagon scientists are training or altering or doing SOMETHING to defenseless Sharks that will allow them to track enemy ships and submarines and stuff.

Let's settle this right now. The panic is unnecessary. There is nothing a Shark can do that does not SERVE DAGON. This development is entirely beneficial to US. We have merely allowed landscum scientists to believe that they are customizing Sharks for use as stealth trackers as a way of obtaining better access to THEIR labs for OUR use.

Everything is under control.